Narcissism is a kind of mental abuse and sometimes we doesn't know that we are under narcissistic abuse
Narcissistic Personality Disorder or (NPD)
Its a personality disorder for those people who are self - centered and self - obsessed. They are also the kind of people who is driven by their culture and beliefs
In phycology people with NPD have no genuine love for themselves, they are in love with an idealized grandiose image of themselves.
Narcissist people are blindly follow rules or traditions even its not even helping their mind and spiritual growth and what they believe is true is what to be believed by others
This people are energy vampires, if your dealing with a narcissist you may find your self draining energetically
They will take and take from you and will not give you back in return or give you small amount in return but what they will take from you is more than what they give
They will not be happy to see other people's happy or in the center of attention because they wants to be in the center of attention always
If the narcissist caught up on their mistakes they will start blaming and gaslight others
They will quickly change from angel to devil and they will make you feel unworthy of yourself and blame you because of your mistakes and they will tell you all the good things they do and give to you even they take more than they give you
This people are good actors and actresses you can't find out if they were telling the truth or not they can get the emphaty of people and makes people hate you because they can twist the situations and act like a victim in front of all people even they know that they are the cause of the problem and you will question your self worth again
This people will not only make you feel worthless but they can also kill you literary and kill themselves so the others will blame you for what they did
If they can't justify their image to others they will commit suicide so the blame will be yours for the rest of your life because they can't accept failures and rejection that's why they are willing to choose to kill themselves than to put down their fragile ego and ask for forgiveness from others
They don't forgive someone and they don't want to feel shame to anyone or even anywhere and they will do anything just to gain someone's respect and admiration
This people can't accept the real image of themselves that's why they will create a perfect image of themselves that will make them more proud and they will love this inflated self - image precisely because it allows them to avoid deep feelings of insecurity
This people can't accept their own weakness and they can't even accept the idea of loosing in all situations that's why if they spot a person who has more ability to them they will do everything to destroy that person because they don't want anyone to be more than them
This person is full of envy and bad intentions to others
The pattern of NPD
Self - centered
Arrogant thinking and behavior
Lack of emphaty and consideration for others
And excessive needs of admiration
They can be described as the cocky manipulative, selfish, patronizing, and demanding they want to control everything and anyone in their lives
They don't care what will you feel or what you think or what you achieve its all about them only them and no one else can be more than them
They are those people who resist change because they have patterns in life and they will not change because they don't accept their wrong even if their patterns in life doesn't really helps them or it causes them problem they will choose to stay on this patterns
The problem of this people is they find it hard to admit their wrong that's why if they see that the action they made in the past caused them a lot of problems they will find someone to blame so they will feel secure and they will be admired by others again
They are those people who seeks attention so much and if you don't give them what they want they will think you disrespect them even your not
They are obsessed with their idea of being perfect and they see themselves perfect more than anyone else
They are good of copying the perfect image of the person on their mind the person that they admire the most and idolized
But how did they become narcissist?
A child that is born is innocent and have a clean soul and heart that's why a child is happy to the simple things and happy just to be with their parents and they dream simple dreams they only wants to play and be happy with the one they love and this child has its own authenticity and identity
The child knows exactly what he wants and what they dont want he cries when his sad and laughs when his happy the child don't care about material things that is the real identity of the child they do what they want and will not do what they don't want
But their parents put in their mind and heart how to be a person and their environment and situations in life change them and ruined and hurt that innocent child and forcedly make that child an adult and loose their innocence
Many of the narcissist comes from an abusive families they are the kind of families that is afraid of shame their family history and family name is very important to them and they don't care what it takes or how it takes just to gain the perfect family image in front of others
That's why they teach and train their child the way they want them to be not the way the child wants to be
If you have a narcissist parents you don't have the right to say NO even their parents teach them wrong they need to obey it because it will be a disrespect to their parents to say NO
and for the sake of their family name they needs to be perfect
Even their emotions are not allowed to show they will marry a person that their parents will choose for them even they don't like or love the person. They will do things that they cannot do just to please their parents they are like a living puppet of their family and if they don't do what their parents say they will be punished by their parents and they think its OK because they are stubborn
This childhood trauma that they experienced will make them lost their own identity and authenticity and they will carry this childhood traumas for their whole life unless they accept they need to be healed
They will pass the belief's of their parents to their children and the children of their children's and if their children's do not obey them they will punish them because they are stubborn
What will happen if you ignore a narcissist?
If they are ignored they will feel disrespect and their tantrums will come out, a behavior that is a monster and they don't even notice that their switching behaviors very quick and they think its normal because you don't want to obey them and they obey everything that others say what is good for them then why don't you obey them if they only wants what's good for you, in their mind its what's good for you that's why you need to obey them
Can a narcissist heal?
Its hard for a narcissist to change unless they put down their fragile ego and accept they needs to change and they learn to let go of their control issues but yes he can, if he accept that he needs to be heal and no one can heal a narcissist but themselves because they are the only one who knows exactly what happened inside his mind and heart when he is experiencing that childhood traumas
If they will give time to themselves to examine their life and try to know who they really are and not who their parents want them to be they will get their power back and their real identity will come out of them naturally and effortlessly they see their life changing and their perspectives will change
They needs to be in a harmony with their present moment and go back from the past memories to heal their childhood traumas and in this way they can plan a better future for themselves
And its the most painful part of the narcissist to go back from the memories of their childhood and heal their inner child no one knows how it hurts to heal a childhood pains that they keep on running for a very long time ago and they really don't want to recall all the memories that is hurting them
After they will heal they will regain their own true power that is more powerful and stronger than they can't imagine a better version of themselves that they don't even know that exist in their whole being
They will learn how to use their intuition and they will feel a harmony inside their body their mind and heart will agree in one decision and it will not battle because they learn to open their heart for themselves and they will eventually feel the genuine concerns to others also
They will be surprised of the person who they are that they don't know for a long time and their own authenticity will come out and this will make them plan for more happy and healthy life for them and their loved ones
They need to learn on how to stand out on what they believe what's true and what's good and bad for them
If they start to know who they are they will start to know what they want and what they don't want
Only self love can heal a broken heart of a child. Embrace the child inside you and love him unconditionally so he will not cry anymore
And once they learn how to love themselves they can accept failures and they will start to forgive themselves and eventually start to forgive everyone that has hurt them and make them suffer specially their parents because our parents are the roots of most of our childhood wounds
If you think you are a victim of a narcissist learn how to put up a healthy boundaries in your life but don't push them away because they really needs understanding and their inner child is screaming to be heard they need emotional and mental help
So if you think your emotionaly healthy and mentally healthy to handle and deal with a narcissist you can help them heal.
But if your not strong enough to handle them and your emotionally weak and mentally weak you better disconnect with them immediately before they destroy you and you will start to doubt on your self worth and abilities as a person
Self love makes you a better person and will gives you protection to all kinds of personalities and circumstances you will encounter in your life
I hope this article can help someone who is suffering from NPD and those people who are victim's of NPD to heal their childhood wounds
Love yourself first the real you will come out once you learn how to love yourself first
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